Month: May 2017

I did not grow up with computers.  I didn’t even take keyboarding in high school.  The first paper I ever wrote on a computer was in my Master’s degree program at WVU.  I was visiting my sister and used her IBM.  In those days, PCs had less memory than I seem to have these days.  You had to load a floppy disc with the operating program (e.g., Word), along with a disc to save your work.  It was basically a fancy typewriter.  I remember having to leave room for the figures in my paper and insert these by cutting a copy to size, taping them in place with Scotch tape, and photocopying the page.  Today?  Well, of course, the reader knows the power our Macs and PCs pack.

So, basically, I have been spending my adult years learning computers.  My skill is still surpassed by my 11-year-old (and, perhaps, my 9-year-old, as well), but I am progressing.

In my research, low budgets and necessity have led me (with many thanks to my Finnish friend and colleague, Frank Borg) to an open source software, R (www.r-project.com).  This has been a tremendous tool for me in my lab, as it allows me the capacity to analyze a variety of data, make plots, and run statistics.  It can do much more, if I only had the time to explore.  It has been a slow process for me.  I learn every time I open the program.  I have gone from newbie to beginner in just six years.

Reflecting on my struggles with R, I have (of course) begun to see the parallels with my own growth and pursuit of “well-centeredness”.  It has been a slow and steady process.  Frank gave me the basic starting code.  I have several books (that read like Greek to me) on R, and I have access to an infinite amount of information (if I know where to look) on the Internet.

At first my code was clunky and bulky.  I lacked understanding of loops and the advanced coding that would streamline my analyses.  I would run data a step at a time; a participant at a time; a variable at a time.  It was slow and frustrating, but I persisted.  Slowly steps made better sense, I found other packages within R that made the handling and processing of data easier and faster.  I am learning loops and how to write code to handle great amounts of data more quickly.  I am still using dozens of lines of code for what I am sure can be done in just a few, but I am making baby steps of progress.

This is not unlike life.  If we desire to learn and to grow, it takes time.  It takes effort.  More often than not, it takes a lot of trial and error to get to the point where we learn that there is yet another—better—way.  I am investing time learning so, in the future, it will be easier.

Well-centered fitness—Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Social well-being—is no different.  We are (hopefully) constantly moving toward perfection.  We cannot stay fixed in our ways.  This is never to say that there is anything wrong with who or where we are.  We are all, after all, on our own personal path.  This is to say that there is always a better us, if we choose to keep moving forward.  We need to put in the effort.

I have much to learn with regards to R.  Presently, I am struggling with writing a loop that will permit me to print a batch of plots in a few lines of code.  I will figure it out, in time.

In the same way, I am figuring out life.  Faith, family, friends, growth, health, and impacting others are my core values.  Daily, I strive to be more perfect in these.  Like programming, the more I grow and learn, the more I see the need to grow and learn more.  I am left to rely on practice and the help of others.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow!

Carpe moment

“Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith.”—Steve Jobs

Sometimes the brick to the head is a wakeup call.  Don’t be discouraged.  Certainly, don’t lose faith.  Look within and look for the opportunity.

Martin Luther King, Jr. said “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”  The challenges in life don’t break us, they make us.  Embrace them.  Welcome the “brick in the head”.

One of the songs in my workout mix is “Man Against the World” by Survivor*:

“Have you ever walked alone at night
Like a man against the world
No one takes your side
A boat against the tide
When your faith is shaken you start to break
And you heart can’t find the words
Tossed upon the sand
I give you a man against the world
All the people cheer ’til the end is near
And the hero takes a fall
Then they’ll drag you through the mud
You’re only flesh and blood
I have walked the path from dark to light
And they’ve yet to come to terms
Alone I take my stand
I’m only a man against the world

And love, like a distant reminder
It tugs at my shoulder
It calls me home
I shout, can a single voice carry
Will I find sanctuary within your arms
Someday when the answer’s clearer
Someday when I even the score
You’ll reach and you’ll find me near you
Right beside you
Forevermore

But for now I’ll walk the night alone
Like a man against the world
A brand new day will shine
Through the avalanche of time
Now the road’s grown long, but the spirit’s strong
And the fire within still burns
Alone I take my stand
I give you a man against the world”

I always have to wait for the next song in the mix.  It can sometimes set the tone for the day.  One more than one occasion, it has been followed by either “Another One Bites the Dust” or “We are the Champions” by Queen.  “Oh, great!” is usually my response to the former.  The latter gives me a sense of invictus maneo the Armstrong moto.

Of course, no pairing of songs can define me.  The coincidence of these songs, however, underscores that life has its choices.  It is “man (or Woman) against the world”, but choose whether “another one bites the dust” or “we are the champions.  Our circumstances are a burden, challenge, or opportunity.  Which?  That is a matter of choice.

“A boat against the tide”, “tossed upon the sand”, dragged “through the mud”, …, or “life hits you in the head with a brick”, today is an opportunity to carpe momentoI  It will be “no bed of roses, no pleasure cruise…(but) consider it a challenge before the whole human race” and know you “ain’t gonna lose”.

Be your best today; be better tomorrow!

* “Man Against the World”, writers: James M. Peterik, Jimmy Wayne Jamison, Frank Sullivan, Jimi Jamison

“We are the Champions”, writer: Freddie Mercury

“To me, teamwork is the beauty of our sport, where you have five acting as one. You become selfless.”—Mike Krzyzewski

My son has a goal in the lacrosse cage this season.  He wants to play to a shutout in goal.  He has already played a second half shutout.  I trust he can do it.

To accomplish this, he needs more than to play a perfect game.  He needs his team.  Success in anything requires a group effort.

He had a second half shutout because he played well, but he also had a team that gelled particularly well in that half of the game.  The defense played splendidly.  Offensively the team was great.  One of their top scorers had returned from an extended trip.  The young players started to really click.  Everyone played well.  It will have to be more perfect to play to a shutout.

If any of us are successful, it is not solely to our own credit.  We could not do it without parents, teachers, coaches, neighbors, friends, partners, and teammates.  We could not do it without the giftedness with which we are blessed, those who prepared and supported us, or those—including the competition—who pushed us.

I feel honored and blessed to have had the parents, teachers, coaches, and support that have brought me where I am.  If I aspire to be a successful professor (and I do), I need campus support, the support of colleagues, and, above all, I need students who desire to be successful.  I also need the support of my family.

I desire to have success in writing—this blog, as well as hopeful book projects.  I would not be able to do this without numerous teachers (Mrs. Moreland, Mrs. Moore, et al. come immediately to mind) and educators through the years.  I will have no success without readers—supporters as well as critics.  I am nothing by myself.  None of us have claim to greatness in anything.

There is no such thing as the “self-made (wo)man”.  We are the product of community and team.  We are made (extra)ordinary by the gift of others.  On our path, we must never forget this.

My son’s goal is admirable.  To succeed, though, he will need to do more than block lacrosse balls.  He will need to lead.  He will need to support.  He will need to encourage.

Success is an admirable pursuit.  We must remember, however, that no one is successful in isolation.  Carpe momento!

“A man has to learn that he cannot command things, but that he can command himself; that he cannot coerce the wills of others, but that he can mold and master his own will: and things serve him who serves Truth; people seek guidance of him who is master of himself.”—James Allen

Self-mastery is a goal of any who seek to be “well-centered”.  Self is quite likely the only thing over which we have control.  We cannot change the circumstances that surround us, but we can choose how we respond to circumstances.  We can choose to be shackled by conditions, or we can receive the opportunity to grow.  We determine to “mold and master” our will, or we resign to be enslaved by time and chance.

In life, we have the choice to see our present situation as a burden, a challenge, or as an opportunity.  Seeing our circumstance as an opportunity is the only positive, growth-favoring option.

Self-mastery begins with our morning routine.  What we determine our day to be, so it will be.  If we set off with thoughts that are pessimistic, fearful, and negative, we can expect that these will follow us through the day.  Positive, affirming, and confident thoughts, however, lead to (extra)ordinary experiences.  These lead to growth and satisfaction.

We cannot change others.  We may not like where we are.  We may feel as if we have no control over our circumstance.  Maybe we don’t, but we do have command of ourselves.  Carpe momento!!

“Only the really young are fearless, have the optimism, the romanticism to take unimaginable risks.”—Olivia Wilde

I recently came across the above quote by actress Olivia Wilde.  I suppose, unfortunately, that there is some truth to the statement.  It is a sad thought, though.  Why must fearlessness and optimism lost on the young.

With age, we are supposed to gain wisdom.  It seems, however, that with wisdom comes caution—as if this is a good thing.

Wisdom is good.  We should make smarter decisions.  We should not be reckless.  Our choices should be guided by experience. But….

Caution, too, is good, but it should not prevent us from taking calculated risks.  Caution should not become a weight upon us. 

Why should the young get to be fearless and optimistic?  We more seasoned adults have the wisdom to guide optimism and be fearless out of knowledge not ignorance.  William Arthur Ward wrote that the pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.”  With age and experience, we learn that the wind will both take us to where we need to go and can take us to where we want to go.  To adjust the sails requires only that we understand how the wind moves the sails and how to manipulate the sails to take advantage of the wind.

Let the mature be fearless and optimistic.  Let the wise take risks calculated on experience.  Caution should not should not become an anchor.  Rather it should be the call to adjust the boom.  Let us capture the winds and take sail even as we leave youth behind.

Carpe momento!

We say it all the time.  Do we mean it?  More importantly, do we accept the challenge?  Do we receive the opportunity?

The admonition to “have a great day” is the acknowledgement from a friend or stranger of the incredible opportunity Today is.  Receive it with gratitude.

Are you told to “have a great day”?  What is stopping you.  I’ll let you in on a secret: The only thing stopping you (me) from having a great day is you (me).  Like so many other things, it is a choice.  We decide whether or not to “have a great day”.  So, carpe momento!

Are you one to greet your neighbor with the mandate to “have a great day”?  Do you mean it?

I am more conscious of saying it—and meaning it.  I am making an honest effort to say it more often and say it with sincerity.  When I say it to the gal who pumps my gas, I say it with the hope that she will.  When the cashier tells me to “have a great day”, I receive it with gratitude and wish it in return.  After all, my friend Andy will tell me that I get to have a great day.  Just because someone tells me to does not mean I have to.  (I don’t get pushed around that way.)

Today is an opportunity.  Have a great day!

When I first thought to write a blog, I considered writing as a “fitness critic”.  I find myself refuting a lot of nonsense in my exercise science classes and find much of what is “new” in the fitness industry to be little more than marketing and buzz words.  I wisely steered clear of this route.  At the time, I was in a more negative place—more critical than usual—and following this direction would have worsened me.  I chose, instead, to focus on the positive side and drive myself (and, hopefully, others) toward what I call “well-centered fitness”.  Today, though, I want to share a bit as the positive fitness critic.

I finally get to stop using quotation marks around the phrase “Bulgarian bag”.  A number of years ago, I came across the Bulgarian Bag® (Suples, Ltd., www.suples.com).  It reminded me of the old “Russian conditioning” drills my high school wrestling coach, David Kling, used to have us do.  Indeed, the Bulgarian bag was originally developed by Ivan Ivanov for wrestlers.  I didn’t have the budget for the real deal and I wanted some to use at the sports performance training center I owned at the time.  So, I found a few YouTube videos on DIY “Bulgarian bags”—sand-filled inner tubes with duct-taped handles.  Being a staunch believer in intellectual property and copyright, I continued to use air quotes when I talked about “Bulgarian bags”.

The bags served their purpose and worked well.  I still have all but one of them (two are holding down lacrosse gear in the driveway).  I lost one when it ruptured against the safety bars on my power rack in the garage.  (Reason #1 why you should buy the original Bulgarian Bag®.)

After the mishap with my DIY “Bulgarian bag”, I went the next least expensive route.  I bought a knock off that you fill yourself.  It was a canvas version from Daan Industries, Inc. (http://mmagrapplingdummies.com/fitness-bags).  It took some effort to fill it correctly, but I had a bag that served my purposes. Its shape is modified from the original Bulgarian Bag, which creates my only criticism of their model (which they, rightfully, don’t even call a “Bulgarian bag”). The handle angle creates a point of weakness at the stress point.  My first model was slightly defective and immediately ripped at the stress point.  I believe this was exacerbated by a poor balancing of the sand on my part (Reason #2 why you should buy the original Bulgarian Bag®), but the customer service at Daan was phenomenal.  I called and had a replacement in less than a week.  To be safe, I added some stitching myself to the stress point and have had no problems.  I was even able to overweight the bag and fill a 15 kg model to 18 kg.  I have had no problems.  The only other limitation I find is that the stuffing in the grips tends to shift when I do extended sets of my core workout.  Not a big deal, though.  It builds grip strength/endurance, and the added straps help.  The bag has served me well.

Thanks to my wife and children’s love on Father’s Day, though, I can now lose the air quotes.  My 17 kg (large) Bulgarian Bag® arrived on Friday!  I had ordered the less-expensive canvas model (which happened to be out of stock and was reserved, which saved me shipping costs!).  I received a call last Monday from customer service informing me that the bag did not come on the latest shipment and would not arrive until August.  I was offered a no-cost upgrade to the synthetic leather—which I, of course, accepted.   (Reason #3 why you should buy the original Bulgarian Bag®–customer service is awesome!)

I was a little giddy to open the box.  I had used the original Bulgarian Bag® before in my exercise science lab, but now I owned my own.  The balance and feel is Reason #4 why you should buy the original Bulgarian Bag®.  It is an amazing tool.

I use the Bulgarian bag mostly for core work.  I like the acceleration/deceleration it offers—something you don’t get in most traditional abdominal and core training.  I also like the versatility for general conditioning—burst-style training.

I do what I call my “core 550” workout.  This includes 5 sets of 10 each of the “hip hinge” (similar to the kettlebell swing), swing right, swing left, spin right, and spin left.  I allow for 1-minute rests between super-sets.  The workout takes about 9 minutes.  We estimated in my lab that it burns between 120 and 160 kcal, not counting the elevated metabolism post-exercise.

The possible workouts are endless.  Now that I have the real deal, I am sure I will get creating and make this a more regular conditioning workout.

Start with the DIY “Bulgarian bag”, if you must.  Progress to the original Bulgarian Bag® as soon as possible.  You won’t be disappointed.

Enjoy!  Carpe momento!

A Mother’s Love’s a Blessing

An Irish boy was leaving
Leaving his native home,
Crossing the broad Atlantic,
Once more he wished to roam,
And as he was leaving his mother,
While standing on the Quay,
He threw his arms around her waist
And this to him did say:

A mother’s love is a blessing,
No matter where you roam.
Keep her while she’s living,
You’ll miss her when she’s gone.
Love her as in childhood,
When feeble, old and grey,
For you’ll never miss a mother’s love
‘Til she’s buried beneath the clay.

And as the years grow onward,
I’ll settle down in life,
And I’ll choose a nice young colleen,
And take her for my wife.
And as the kids grow older,
They’ll play around my knee
And I’ll teach them the very same lesson
That my mother taught to me:

A mother’s love is a blessing,
No matter where you roam.
Keep her while she’s living,
You’ll miss her when she’s gone.
Love her as in childhood,
When feeble, old and grey,
For you’ll never miss a mother’s love
‘Til she’s buried beneath the clay.

— Thomas Keenan

[Image source: http://www.pueblomall.com/event/mothers-day/]

Well, that time has come.  My 11-year-old son is going to his first school dance.  I am excited for him, and I am nervous for him.  I remember that age and how awkward I was (and still am).  I made a lot of mistakes in the romance department.  I don’t want my son to repeat my mistakes—and, of course, he won’t.  He’ll make his own.  I just hope I can help him avoid as many mistakes as he can.

I hope girls and dating is a positive experience for him—and the girls.  I wrote Lessons for Liam before he was born in hope that my thoughts and experiences might at least benefit him.  The following was intended for days like today.  I hope he takes it to heart.  If I knew then what I know now, I would have caused less pain and enjoyed myself more.  It is what it is, and I am who I am from the experiences.  My role now is to parent and raise the best son (and daughter) I can.

“When you begin dating, let your motivation be getting to know women.  Don’t look on the outward appearance or the popularity of the girl.  Date widely—that is, date even those girls to whom you have no physical attraction.  Chances are you will find that you have more in common with the girls than first thought.  Realize that there are valuable qualities in all people.  Sometimes—perhaps more often than not—the less popular girls are flowers waiting to bloom.  I think high school reunions in your future will prove me correct.  It won’t be the women you were too insecure to date as a teenager who will catch you eye as a man.  It will be those outward beauty catches up with their inward loveliness.

Not every date you go on needs to be romantic.  In fact, I would discourage you from dating romantically until late college at best.  Don’t rate girls on their potential as girlfriends or mates.  Seek to have many girl friends.  I am certain, then, you will find yourself very popular with the ladies.

Don’t be afraid to go against popular opinion.  Don’t feel like you need to date the most beautiful or popular girl in school.  Rather, consider dating those girls who, perhaps, aren’t dated as often.  It doesn’t have to be a big deal either.  It might only be to go for a walk, hike, or bike ride.  It might only be to go for an ice cream cone.  It might be to go to a sporting event or a free concert.  You often don’t have to spend a dime.  All it might cost you is a few hours of your time—time you would have spent doing what you are doing anyhow.

When you date, make it about her.  Don’t spend time talking about yourself.  Ask questions.  Make her laugh.  Make her feel good about herself.  Help her recognize the beauty that lies inside.  Encourage her.  Love her.

While you might find one special girl you want to spend your time with, avoid the temptation to have a steady girlfriend.  Certainly, don’t date with the intent of finding a girlfriend.  If you do, first, you will be more susceptible to heartache; and, second, you will miss opportunities.  Date widely.  Have many girl friends.  If there is one special girl, fine.  But, don’t date exclusively and don’t be possessive.  Let her date widely as well.” –Lessons for Liam

Image: Napoleon Dynamite

“When we are sure that we are on the right road there is no need to plan our journey too far ahead. No need to burden ourselves with doubts and fears as to the obstacles that may bar our progress. We cannot take more than one step at a time.”—Orison Swett Marden

We are on a journey.  Our paths are not the same.  We don’t all travel at the same pace.  Nobody is “on right track” (thus implying that others are “on the wrong track”).  We are just on different paths.

We have a tendency to judge.  We judge those who aren’t as progressed in the journey.  We judge those who are (seemingly) farther along in the journey than we perceive ourselves to be.  Yeah, this has to stop. 

We are where we are.  I am where I am.  You are where you are.  We need to just accept each other in the place the other is.  We need to understand that we are all somewhere and that is not where we are going to ultimately end up—or it least it shouldn’t be.

Growth.  Change.  Progress.  These are never final destinations.

Spiritual “well-centeredness” requires that we acknowledge that the Universe is bigger than we are.  We are connected.  We are co-creations in something with infinite boundaries.  How then can we put limits on what we don’t know?

I consider myself a person of faith.  “Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen” (Hebrews 11:1).  As such, I have to leave room for the realization that what I believe is grossly inadequate.  This is not to say “false”.  Rather, it is likely that it is incomplete.  I am learning.  I am growing.  In turn, I trust that others are growing and learning.  So, if we are hoping for the same thing and in the process of searching, is it not best to meet others where they are?  After all, they are meeting us where we are.

I find it exciting that we are doing life together in ways that will pass regularly from incongruent to congruent to incongruent.  It is in these moments of discomfort that we stimulate growth.  Carpe momento!