We often waste time trying to live up to someone else’s potential or view of success. There is a reason we are all so different. The world needs our uniqueness. We are not born, however, at our true potential.
I have grown (pun intended) to prefer to view growth and potential using asymptotes (remember learning about a curve that approaches a line, but never reaches, as it approaches infinity?). Our growth—Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Social—is like this. Or, rather, it should be like this. We have an inherent “potential” (call it “Purpose” in the collective sense) that is unique—individualized—that we should be growing toward. This growth is constant (kaizen) and never fully achieved.
Unfortunately, we tend to measure ourselves against another’s asymptote which leaves us unsatisfied and ordinary. We also determine that we should be on the same timeline for growth as another. Worse yet, we tend to put others (especially our children) on our timeline. We grow at our own rate. Don’t worry if it is slower than others.
Progress needs to be measured with the right yardstick. In research methods, we refer to this as validity. More importantly it has to be measured against the right target. I know I am mixing metaphors a bit here. (Forgive me Mrs. Moore.) Asymptotes. Targets. Yardsticks. Kaizen. Growth. These do have something in common—you/me. In exercise science, we refer to the principle of individuality.
Growth should be measured according to a target with an ever-shrinking bulls-eye. Today has its target. We aim to get close to the center. We may with effort hit the bulls-eye, but we never hit the perfect center. As well, the bulls-eye must be smaller tomorrow—if not there is no measurable growth.
If I do life well today, there is always something I can do better tomorrow. In some things, we will see tremendous and rapid growth. In other things, growth will be small and slow—but it is still growth. Our focus should be on the areas of our lives in which we have the greatest potential for growth. We don’t neglect or ignore the other areas. Rather we seek to be balanced and ever-growing toward our Purpose—be it extraordinary or (extra)ordinary.
Life is not a competition to be the best. Rather, it is an opportunity to be our best. Compare yourself against your personal asymptotes, not your neighbors. It is far more rewarding and productive.
Be your best today; be better tomorrow.
Carpe momento!