We have a tendency to think that in order to grow ourselves—physically or otherwise—we have to work harder. We think we have to push ourselves more. Maybe it is the training montages from the Rocky movies? Maybe it is parents and coaches? Study harder. Train harder. Do more cardio. Work longer hours. Get up earlier and stay up later…. The reality is that growth comes during rest. Physiologically, our bodies need an appropriate stimulus to grow, but this has to be followed with sleep and proper nutrition. We are no different in the other areas of personal growth—Spiritual, Intellectual, Emotional, and Social, as well as Physical.
Being “well-centered” is not only about more time spent working on the five dimensions. Indeed, we need stimulus for growth. The physiological principle of overload applies—i.e., in order for a body system (in this case, any dimension of wellness) to grow, it must be stressed to a level greater than that to which it is accustomed. But, equally important is the principle of recovery—adequate time needs to be allowed for the system to adapt. In other words, we need to allow time for rest.
Spiritually, we need time for contemplation. We must allow for prayerful reflection and meditation. Otherwise, our Spiritual pursuits are just knowledge and words. Rather, these need to be internalized.
Physically, sleep and a healthy diet are indispensable. Listen to your body. I learned in graduate school that physical exercise should cause a “pleasant sense of fatigue”. That is, you should feel it, but you can’t push the extent of “no pain, no gain”. Dr. Mike Israetel speaks of “maximal recoverable volume”—the maximal training load from which you can adequately recover by the next training session.
Physically, if you are chronically over-tired, lethargic, aching, and prone to illness, you are probably over-training. You need sleep. Sleep is when your body repairs itself and grows. Physical growth and adaptation comes after training.
Intellectually, as well, your brain needs time to process information. I learned from some very effective professors in my undergraduate schooling at WVU the importance of sleep in preparing for exams. I try to share this with my students, but, invariable, some will still insist on pulling the classic “all-nighter”.
The brain, likes the muscles and cardiorespiratory system, needs time to recover and “grow”. Information needs to be processed and stored in the brain for adequate recall. I tell my students that the best thing they can do the night before an exam is sleep. I encourage them to do something relaxing and get to bed early. During this time, the brain is processing the information. I always found, as a student, that I would dream about information on the exam. By morning, I was well-prepared (assuming that I have been studying along the way and attending class). Our brain continues to function this way even after our formal education ends. We need to spend time in thoughtful contemplation. We need to consider what we are learning (if we are to be truly learning).
Emotionally, we need a rest from time to time, as well. I strive to be positive (though, truthfully, it is a struggle for me). Sometimes, positivity has to begin with a façade. Sometimes, we have to force our attitude to shape our attitude. This takes energy. We might be able, through journaling, positive self-talk, etc., to start the day with positive momentum, but that movement is likely to be challenged by negative forces throughout the day. It can be a drain on us to remain Emotionally “well-centered”. Much like our Physical dimension, there is a certain “maximal recoverable volume” of stress we can handle. Emotionally, we often need a break.
I often write that the Emotional dimension is the “cornerstone” of well-centered fitness. It should be apparent here, as our Emotional recovery is largely dependent upon our practices in the other dimensions, as well as the fact that these other dimensions rely on our Emotional well-centeredness. Sometimes, we just need a break emotionally. It might be to just scream, cry, or laugh—just letting out what we hold in (at the most appropriate time, of course). We must allow ourselves to relax our emotions. As well, we must adequately develop the other dimensions in order to have a more controlled emotional response to our circumstances.
We also need to break Socially. We need alone time. We need to escape annoying and aggravating people. We need to just “chill”. Most importantly, we need to surround ourselves with close friends and family who can give us space. In other words, we need people who we can pull close when we need them, but who understand that we need them to leave us alone at times.
Clingy, needy people can wear on us. We should want to help who and when we can, but sometimes we need a break from helping. Sometimes we just need a break from others.
There are reasons why Judeo-Christian writings teach us to take a Sabbath rest from our work. Yes, it gives us a break from the physical labor, but it also gives us a break from the people and stresses of our jobs. We should welcome such a rest.
We also need the social rest from the cares in our personal lives. “Me time”, date nights, the “15-minute check-in”, family game nights, daddy-daughter (mother-son) dates, and the like are all important to healthy families and relationships.
If you are overload with the stress of work, worries, and/or relationships, take a break! Better yet, take the break before you become overloaded. Don’t take too casual of an approach, as our intent is to grow, but allow yourself to be moderately moved from out of your comfort zone and allow for planned rest.
Growth requires both the stimulus (Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and/or Social) and recovery. One’s growth plan should allow for both.
Be your best today; be better tomorrow!
Carpe momento!