“Whatever we expect with confidence becomes our own self-fulfilling prophecy.”
–Brian Tracy
Others will undoubted judge us and belittle us. Our choice is to believe the naysayers or to defy them. Confidence, ultimately, comes from within. It comes from recognizing and accepting who we are. A strong sense of Purpose is essential to resiliency.
As parents (as well as teachers, coaches, and the like), we must give our children a sense of self-worth and Purpose without developing a sense of entitlement. Understanding that we all have strengths and weaknesses—that we are uniquely gifted—is essential to developing self-efficacy.
Rarely will the actions of others be focused on our best interests. People—parents, teachers, coaches, bosses, etc.—are inherently selfish. When their actions make us feel ashamed, we must take ownership of our response. This is not easy when it bombards us (our children) from many sides, but it is our choice to hear the voices of negativity or the voices of support.
It is a healthy habit to carefully filter these voices. There may be some truth to the negative comments (even the best coaches may be unskilled at communication and empathy), as well as the positive comments (most encouraging comments can sometimes lack the necessary correction to make one better).
The best gift we can give our children is a positive and realistic sense of self. Let them know (and we must regularly tell ourselves) that they (we) are unique for good reason. If we feel inadequate, we are focused on our limitations rather than our strengths. For our youth, this is particularly hard—especially in the age of social media when we are pressured to judge ourselves by “likes” and emojis and veiled comments. Teach your children to be their own best judge—and to like themselves.
When I say “be your best today”, I speak first to myself. The message is not “be someone else’s image of the best today”. The message is to take all the talents and giftedness you have and make the most of them.
Spiritual well-centeredness is the understanding that we are not the center of the Universe—nor is any other. We all have a unique role to play.
Physical well-centeredness is to make the most of physical body we are given. It is not about physical appearance. Rather, it is a focus on health and personal performance.
Don’t let your standards be set by others. Embrace yourself, and…
Be your best today; be better tomorrow.
Carpe momento!